27 October 2005

finally i understand the hype...

i missed a poetry slam in late august and there was a poem read there that has been much hyped by those who did hear it... i have finally gotten around to finding said poem, and i must agree that it is hilarious... so for all the rest of you who missed that slam, and those who enjoied it the first time...

Hot Ass Poem
Jennifer Knox
Hey check out the ass on that guy he's got a really hot ass I'd like to see his ass naked with his hot naked ass Hey check out her hot ass that chick's got a hot ass she's a red hot ass chick I want to touch it Hey check out the ass on that old man thats one hot old man ass look at his ass his ass his old man ass Hey check out that dog's ass wow that dog's ass is hot that dog's got a hot dog ass I want to squeeze that dog's hot dog ass like a ball but a hot ball a hot ass ball Hey check out the ass on that bird how's a bird get a hot ass like that that's one hot ass bird ass I want to put that bird's hot ass in my mouth and swish it around and around and around Hey check out the ass on that bike damn that bike's ass it h-o-t you ever see a bike with an ass that hot I want to put my hot ass on that bike's hot ass and make a double hot ass bike Hey check out that building it's got a really really really hot ass and the doorman and the ladies in the informatiom booth and the guy in the elevator got themselves a butt load of hot ass I want to wrap my arms around the whole hot ass building and squeeze myself right through its hot ass and out the other side I want to get me a hot ass piece of all 86 floors of hot hot hot hot ass! —from Great American Prose Poems: from Poe to the Present. Ed., David Lehman. New York: Scribner, 2003


  1. That sounds like some of the free writes I get from my students. Hmmm..maybe I should publish them?

  2. look at that kilt that is a hot ass kilt I'm going to put my hot ass in that hot ass kilt and have a double hot ass kilt

    Brilliant. Yet another reason why getting an MFA appeals to me more and more...

  3. I can say in full confidence that this is the worst poem to date.